Gifts for Children

by sssmahh303, posted in Wellness

Mary Ann 

I have worked with children for over 40 years, and during that time, they have taught me a few things that I would like to share.  I am also a mother and grandmother, and the family, too, have all taught me life lessons as well. So, I compiled a list of what I think are the most important gifts, the most valuable gifts, you can give children.  These are not American Dolls or video games or a new Smartphone. These gifts are from the heart and soul and will outlast any toy.  Originally, I wrote this for a school newsletter, and one of the parents who was a publisher of a city magazine also ran it in her magazine – a sweet gesture to me.  

Gifts for Children
  1. The Gift of Love – We need to give our children unconditional love.  They need to know that there is a safe harbor from life’s storms.
  2. The Gift of Time – We need to make time for each of our children each day.  The time you have children in your home will go very quickly, and it is the minutes of a day that you make the biggest difference.  Take time to read, time to talk, time to snuggle, and time to be with them.
  3. The Gift of Acceptance – God gives each child treasures to bring into the world. Each child has different abilities.  We need to be happy with the treasure and not dwell on the things that may not be a strength.  Perfection is a hard burden for a child to carry. 
  4. The Gift of Language – We need to be talking to our children and helping them to learn words. We need to give them lots of experience so they can talk about them.  We need to read to children, say nursery rhymes, and “play” with words.  This is not the job of the television.
  5. The Gift of Example – We need to walk our talk.  If we expect our children to be honest, we must be honest in our own daily lives.  Your actions speak louder than your words.  Children are watching.
  6. The Gift of Consequences – We need to let children learn that their choices have good and bad consequences.  We cannot create a perfect world for them. That is an injustice to children who live in an imperfect world.  They need to know how to cope with mistakes and disappointments.
  7. The Gift of No – Children need to have boundaries and to know their limitations.  We can say “no” to a child, and he or she will still love us.  Children are not in charge of families.  
  8. The Gift of Curiosity – Children naturally love to learn, and we need to keep them ever curious about the world. We need to develop lifelong learners so they will keep growing. Your interest in the world will plant those seeds.  

As parents and grandparents, we have the awesome responsibility to shepherd our children and grandchildren through life.  Hoping these gift ideas will help be a north star to what is truly important to our children.  

It has been a few years since I originally wrote this article.  I don’t think I would change anything that I proposed.  If anything, I think I would add something about kindness, especially in the times we are living.  Be Kind is just too important to be ignored today.  We need to talk about it and live it each day.  It fits with most of the other gifts.

Hoping this blog with help you and the families in your life in the coming school year.  Learning is more than reading, writing, and arithmetic.  It is also growing a loving and kind heart, and you can be the most influential teacher with these gifts to the children in your life.   

The 5 Types of Wealth: Time

by Cynthia, posted in Taking Care of Business

The 5 Types of Wealth: a Transformative Guide to Design Your Dream Life by Sahil Bloom is an easily readable, non-fiction treatise on the value of Time, Social, Mental, Physical, and Financial opportunities. Mr. Bloom finished writing this book as he turned 32. Yet, my observation of his ideas leads me to believe Sahil is an “old soul.”  He seems wise beyond his years, quoting from many of the [business] gurus of our Baby Boomer professional lives; ancient philosophers, scientists, and mathematicians; and contemporary writers and speakers.

While much of the book focuses on building one’s life along with their career, he has wisdom to share with those of us who are retired yet still active. Thus, I share his perspectives which also serve as a catalyst to my own thinking – past and present.

In his introductory section Sahil reflects that he was in a very successful career, however a mentor he respected began asking him poignant questions. He was certain that he knew what success was but when he had reached that goal, he found happiness was elusive. His mentor suggested he visualize his ideal day at eighty years old. Through these visualizations and after several interviews with more mature people he came to “a powerful realization:  We all want the same thing – and it has very little to do with money.”  He determined most people’s ideal future dealt with Time, People, Purpose, Health.

Bloom provides a quiz in the beginning, offering the reader a look into his/her perception of each of these environments. Then he provides an avenue for reviewing each aspect.  In the Time Wealth section he highlights the importance of spending time based on your personal goals.  Of course this is a basic management concept. Yet have we stated the importance of spending time with family and friends?

As senior citizens many of us now wish we had more time to spend with other people, such as our parents, many of whom have passed on. Our friends, children, siblings, and others.

Many years ago I failed to take an extra step to locate contact information for a person whom I had respected and wished to tell him so.  When I finally took the time, I learned he had just passed away. I vowed that day to make time for people – family and friends who are loved ones, along with acquaintances I admired.  I have since made a point to reach out with a quick note – handwritten, emailed, or txtd – just to let them know someone remembers them.

Recently I invited a couple of friends to join me for coffee with a woman who had been a local leader. Ruth was always encouraging and supportive of women, yet now at 89 and in an assisted living retirement community, no one visits her. People who were “best of friends” have not reached out. While I would not have said we were good friends, I always visited with her at various meetings, occasionally enjoying a dinner out with her. I now make it a point to see her at least once a month.

As Bloom points out, it is important to understand that our time is finite. It is impermanent. In our winter years, we know this all too well. Still, are we making the effort to take advantage of the time we have? Are we allowing ourselves the freedom to choose how we want to spend each minute of each day? Are we tending to and focusing on the things that leave a legacy and that matter most to us? Bloom asks his big question: “How many moments do you have remaining with your loved ones?”

It is never too late to take control of the time we have. Time marches on. Let’s step in line and make the most of the time we have.

Let Them

by sssmahh303, posted in Reviews

Mary Ann

Mel Robbins is the number one female podcaster in the world.  She excels at taking research and making it relatable to the average person.  Mel knows how to ask just the right questions of her podcast guests.  She is authentic and vulnerable as she share her life stories and experiences.  Over the last few years, she has developed The Let Them Theory, and it now has become a best-selling self-help book.  

If you are fan of Mel Robbins, you will love the book.  If you are new to her work, you will find answers to questions you may have.  For me, Let Them and Let Me which are the two main premises of The Let Them Theory reminded me of the Serenity Prayer.  Let Them and grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change are both alike, and Let Me and grant me the courage to change the things that I can are similar.  Regardless, it is good advice to live by.  Mel tells you how to use the principles with several examples from her life or her family and friends.    She has done in depth research and had conversations with experts in the field of psychology that she shares in the book.  

She gives excellent advice on friendships and romantic relationships.  When you are hurting from a toxic friendship or trying to heal from a broken heart, you can find solace in The Let Them Theory.  Individuals with addiction issues can find support in the book as well.  

Life is hard and sometimes you need a little help from you friends, and sometimes a friend can be a book. You cannot change other people. You can only change yourself.  You have to say Let Them and then take steps to Let Me to care for yourself.  As someone who tries to fix everything, The Let Them Theory, was a good book to relate to my character flaws.

This is worth a read in your personal journey to self-discovery.  If you like the book, check out the podcast.  The Mel Robbins Podcasts are also full of good advice and interesting guests.  I am not sure Mel herself has developed new ideas, but she does bring the work of others to her audience and does the digging for you.  Her keen sense of what is important guides the way.  She can summarize topics in a concise and empathic manner making many subject relatable and understandable.  Thanks, our friend, Mel!  (When you listen to the podcasts, you will understand this ending.) 

Placemats

by sssmahh303, posted in Lifestyle

Mary Ann

As I shared with you in past blogs, I like to use items in different ways than their original purpose.  So, I want to share with you new ideas for a placemat.  

This all started when I was looking for accent pillows for my guest room.  I could not find exactly what I was looking for, but I did find the perfect pattern on a scalloped placement.  I bought four of them.  I paired them to create the front and the back of a pillow.  The placements were a black flowered pattern.  I made a black and white checked ruffle to surround the pillows (an easy way to make a ruffle is to sew a piece of yarn along the open edge of the material using a wide zigzag stitch. Then just pull the yarn to gather the material).  I attached the ruffle between the placements and then I sewed them all together leaving a small opening to add quilt stuffing.  Later, I hand stitched the opening.  

The pillows were just perfect in my guest room that was decorated in black, white, and pink.  The pillows accented the black and white toile bed spread and black and white checked dust ruffle and European pillow shams.  I have since used the same pillows in my bedroom that accented the black, white, and red bed linens.  Those placemat pillows are one-of-kind and have remained in excellent condition in two different bedroom settings.  This is an easy and inexpensive way to create unique décor.

Crafting unique tissue “boxes” is the second idea for placemats. The steps are simple, and the creative ideas are endless.  First, you need to buy some placemats.  At the end of each holiday season, stores such as Marshalls or HomeGoods discount the holiday placemats so for a dollar or two you can find the cutest seasonal placemats.  Then you fold the ends of each placemat to the center.  Pin the open ends at the top and the bottom of the placemat to secure it.  At this point, you can add trim such as pom poms, rick rack, or beads between the pinned ends.  Craft or fabric stores have trims available, and I did find several resources online that include Amazon, of course, but there are small companies that specialize in trims which may have more unique designs.  

After you have everything pinned together, you sew up the two ends.  You are almost done.  I then use holiday jewelry which is often on sale after the holiday as well.  If it is a pin, I put it in one of the corners.  Sometimes I use a novelty button or applique which may need to be sewed on, or I use Velcro dots or fabric glue to attach. The holiday jewelry gives a little character to the tissue “box.”  Then use Velcro dots to close the tissue top.  72 count boxes of Kleenex or other brands that are about 2 inches high fit perfectly inside with a few wiggles.  Also, you can find some soft-sided packages of tissues that fit as well.   Press the Velcro dots together pulling the tissue at the center.  Voila!  You are done. 

The tissue “box” fits almost anywhere and becomes part of my holiday decorations. I change for each one. The tissue “boxes” make nice gifts, and I always give a few extra boxes of tissues with it.  You can also make ones that go with your bedroom or wherever and are more permanent parts of your décor. 

I have had fun finding all the placemats and the accents for tissue “boxes” and pillows. As they say, “Necessity is the mother of Invention.”  It has been true for these creations.  I hope you will give this a try and use an ordinary placemat to create unique items for your home.  

Siblings Birthdays

by Cynthia, posted in Friends and Family

Today is my aunt Madaline’s 96th birthday. Had my mom lived, it would also have been hers. Obviously, they were twins. Even into their 90s they still looked so much alike that people who didn’t know them well would mistake one for the other. We always got a laugh out of that.

Aunt Madaline is the introvert; mom was the extrovert. Both had a positive outlook on life and laughed often, as did their father, who had a booming laugh with eyes that sparkled when he smiled. Both were generous with their time and talents. Born in Kansas, they always reminded me of sunflowers, always “turning toward the light.”

It wasn’t until I moved my mother in with me and started helping her prepare birthday cards and gifts for her siblings that I came to the realization of the siblings’ birth dates. I was fascinated when I found that July and August 14 were the female siblings’ birth dates. March and April 24 were the male siblings birth dates. These days ending in fours make it easy for me to carry on the tradition of acknowledging my aunts’ and uncles’ birthdays – at least the ones on my mother’s side of the family.  Of the five of them, three are still living and in relatively good health.

The youngest was my Uncle Campbell. When he turned 89, he told my mom, who was a hospice patient, that she had to hold on until he turned 90 so all of them could be in the 90s together. He made it to 90 in March, just a couple of months before mom passed away late in May. We all got such a kick out of him. As with my grandfather, Uncle Campbell loved life, laughed often, and made friends everywhere he went.  We lost him in December last year, the same year my mom passed. I found that somewhat ironic.

Last month I took brunch to the youngest sister and middle sibling to celebrate her birthday. She had married a farmer, so her life was much different from the twins’ lives. My mother and aunt Madaline worked outside of the home – mom, part time. Madaline and her husband, a WWII veteran who is 99, owned a flower shop and a department store in a small town in Kansas, before moving to the city where my parents lived. The “boys” were a Navy captain and a business executive, respectively.  These siblings were close even though they lived in different states and sometimes in different countries.

On my daddy’s side, only one sibling is still living. She is a beautiful 83-year-old who looks like a 65-year-old. She loves to entertain, getting special dish ideas off Pinterest to fit the occasion. We celebrated her July 2 birthday this year with a tropical-themed brunch. (I make a point *not* to use the patriotic theme for her birthday each year.) It was a privilege to host her, her husband, and my cousins for a small gathering in Aunt Kathy’s honor. She is an amazing woman!

Of course, I like to celebrate my own siblings, too. Sadly, our brother is no longer with us physically but remains in our hearts. My sister and my sister-in-love make a point to touch base frequently – sometimes multiple times a day! While birthday gifts are no longer as important as they once were, acknowledgement in even more so. The older we get, the more we appreciate the gift of family … and of friends.

Saying happy birthday is just another way to say, “You are important to me. I love you.”

Earn Your Wings

by sssmahh303, posted in Wellness

Mary Ann

When I was a little girl, my mother would always say that when I did a kindness, I was earning my wings.  I had no ideas what she was talking about until one day I realized I was earning my angel wings, a place in heaven.  Boy, was that an epiphany! 

We are living in a world where kindness is a vanishing commodity.  There are still very kind people who go out of their way to help you.  However, there is a lot of cruelty in the world and just plain meanness.  They are not earning their wings.  

We need to have grace with one another.  It makes life a bit easier when we do.  Etienne de Grellet famous quote summarizes this way of living.  “I shall pass this way but once; any good that I can do or any kindness I can show to any human being: let me do it now.  Let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”  Imagine if we all lived by that advice.  No Hunger, No War, No Poverty, No Hate, No Bullying, No Hurt….

I have been blessed with kind people in my life, and I try hard to be kind to those in my orbit.  As they say in the south, my life has been “an embarrassment of riches!”  If, I ever win the lottery, I would have such great joy giving most of it away to help the world.  Wouldn’t that be fun to make that happen?

 When I look back on my life, there is an incident that showed me what real kindness is.  I was perusing an antique shop, and my eyes landed on a cherry dresser that had 7 mirrors on it, and it was instantly love at first sight.  What beautiful lady stood before this gorgeous piece of furniture when it was newly made?  Well, I asked the shop owner how much it was.  He said $1600.  It might as well be $160,000.  I was just recently divorced, and I had to provide for two children.  Teaching did not pay enough to allow such a luxury.  However, the owner said that the dresser was a consignment piece, and the owner of it was picking it up later in the week. I could talk to her and see if she would sell it for less. 

So, I returned to the shop and met the lady who owned the dresser.  I asked her if she were willing to sell it for less.  She asked what I could pay.  I pulled $500 out of the air knowing the piece was worth so much more. She said if I would give her $600, the dresser was mine.  Well, $600 was also impossible for me to buy it, and I told her.  She said that if I could send her $50 a month until it was paid off, I could have the dresser.  This lady did not know me from Adam, yet she took a chance.  She was trusting a young woman who fell in love with her antique dresser. 

I came to know that she herself was a former teacher, divorced, and raised her children by herself. She had walked in my shoes and knew it was like to not to have much money.  She wanted someone who loved the dresser to have it.  That was me!  For the following year, I sent a check each month and at the end of the year, the dresser was mine.  I still have that beloved antique and forty years later, I have never forgotten the kindness that was extended to me.  It may be just a piece of furniture, yet it actually was so much more.  It was one person touching the heart of another, a lesson to remember for a lifetime.  I have tried to pass this particular kindness on by giving most of the antiques that I no longer needed or wanted to someone who would love them. They are gifts! 

So when you hear someone speak about passing kindness forward, remember when someone was kind to you, keep it in your heart, and earn your angel wings for a better world!!

Cleaning Out the Closet

by Cynthia, posted in Taking Care of Business

Do you have this dilemma? I have plenty of clothes. My closet is full. Yet when it comes time to get dressed, I cannot find anything to wear.  I even shop for outfits; that is, when I am deciding what to purchase, I make a point to find two or three tops for a pair of pants, shorts, or a skirt.  I think I am being organized, and travel packing is easier. Still …. well, you get the picture.

So summer is in full swing and still I have not repositioned my clothes for easier access. Of course I have the added challenge of having moved my linens from another closet to make room for my grandchildren’s clothes. (One lives with me full time; the other when she is in the mood. Both have their own rooms at my house. But that is another story.)

I have boxes and boxes of shoes that likely will not be worn again, but I can’t bring myself to get rid of them. I have several tops that are nice but that have not been worn for a couple of years. There are dresses that I “may” need one day. And, oh, those jackets, ponchos, and pullovers for winter that were useful once upon a time. All this in addition to the fact that I donated my professional clothes – suits, blouses, slacks, jackets – to Suited for Success soon after I retired eight years ago!

Last year I got the bright idea to put a tag on each hanger.  When I wore an item, I removed the tag and the item stays in the closet. At the end of the season, those items with tags still on their hangers were to be donated.  It was a brilliant idea! And it worked – sort of.

I’m disgustingly organized, too. One rack has long-sleeved blouses, sorted by color; another short-sleeved and sleeveless, also sorted by color. The pant rack is divided with hanging labels (yes, I made labels!) for shorts, capris, summer slacks, winter slacks, summer sweats, winter sweats, jeans, and athletic pants. Dresses, nightgowns, and robes are in the taller space. Shelves hold shoes in their original boxes, labels facing out to remind me what is in each.  Still, my closet feels messy and I can’t find something to wear!  It’s time to pull everything out and start again!

So how do I attack this project? Wendy Rose Gould in Real Simple suggests first, set a goal – how much do I want to clean out? Deciding on an amount ahead of the project may seem too confining. However, with an amount in mind it takes some of the emotion out of clearing. Next, gather boxes and trash bags to immediately place pieces for donations, resell, repair, and trash. 

As I look at each item, I can ask myself: Do I enjoy wearing this? Does it make me feel comfortable and attractive? When will I wear the item? With what will I wear it. Would I love to wear this if I have something to complement it? Kaitlyn Yarborough wrote in Southern Living that she uses the Rule of 3.  If she can’t visualize wearing the item in at least three different ways, it’s out. In this way I suppose you are setting an intention for donning the item in the coming weeks. As for those clothes that are too big or too small, get rid of them. I once bought a dress I adored but I needed to lose about an inch in the waste for it to fit properly. That dress hung in my closet for several years before I finally concluded it was never going to fit. It would fit someone – just not me.

Another challenge is “Why am I holding on to this item that I haven’t worn?”  Was it a gift, thus I feel guilty about ridding myself of it, even though I have not enjoyed wearing it?  Is it an item I wore for a special occasion or on a memorable trip? By identifying the nostalgic reason opposed to the practical I will wear this when …. I can more easily put it in the donation pile.  I can take a picture of it, if I don’t already have one, and thus remember the item without leaving it unused and taking up space. Kaitlyn suggests an “Outbox” much as email uses.  Put sentimental clothes that are those you are not sure of into a temporary storage box and put it away.  If you don’t go to it in a month or two, it is time to donate the items.

And then there is the item you love but it has to be dry cleaned or it must be treated carefully in the laundry, so you put off wearing it for days you are out and about. Especially now that I am at home several days of the week, I don’t wear high-maintenance clothes for cooking, cleaning, reading, writing, and gardening. I even find myself wondering if it is worth “dirtying” the outfit for a one-and-a-half hour meeting. In this case I really have to decide if I want to keep the item … and wear it!

Now, there are those items I love to wear but really, really need to go – and probably not into the donate pile, if you know what I mean. How many pants and shirts do I need to pull weeds, paint, or just lazy around?

Finally, just do it! Looking at the messy closet, overthinking and procrastinating do nothing to help move the project along. The clothes are washed and ironed, so I need to pull things out of my closet, instead of telling you how to approach this task. Wish me luck!

The God of the Woods

by Cynthia, posted in Reviews

By Liz Moore

“The God of the Woods,” an evocative title that promises myth, mystery, and a haunting exploration of both landscape and psyche, is a literary work that draws readers into the tangled, shadowed depths of a story both timeless and timely.  The narrative unfolds in layers, blending perspectives: the grieving family, a relentless investigator, the insular townsfolk, and the enigmatic presence rumored to haunt the forest’s depths. Each voice adds texture to the central mystery, deepening our sense of unease and fascination. The novel deftly balances suspense with introspection; the woods are not just a place of external danger, but of internal reckoning.

“The God of the Woods” boasts a cast of deeply drawn characters, each grappling with their own secrets and sorrows. Some of the characters are likeable; many the reader will love to loathe. The story of a child missing for fourteen years anxieties is woven skillfully into flashbacks and recollections. And now, another child has gone missing.

The investigator, often an outsider in the community, brings with her a quiet determination and a past of her own. Her dogged pursuit of truth serves as a catalyst for the community’s unravelling.

Townsfolk, from the eccentric hermit rumored to commune with spirits, to the stoic schoolteacher who knows more than she reveals, offers a rich tapestry of motives and memories. The shifting perspectives grant the reader both intimacy and distance; we are drawn into each character’s world, yet always aware of the secrets that separate them.

Suspense is a constant, simmering presence in “The God of the Woods.” The mystery at its heart is not just “whodunit,” but “whydunit”—the motivations and histories that drive people to desperate ends. Clues emerge slowly, sometimes in the form of half-remembered dreams or local legends that may or may not be true.  When the resolution comes, it is both surprising and inevitable — a testament to the author’s skill in planting seeds early on and allowing them to ripen naturally. The ending is satisfying without being simplistic; it honors the complexity of grief, forgiveness, and the enduring pull of the wild.

In sum, “The God of the Woods” is a masterful exploration of mystery, memory, and myth. Its lush prose, complex characters, and haunting setting coalesce into a work that is as much about the secrets we keep as it is about the ones we seek to uncover. It is a novel that lingers like the scent of pine after rain—an invitation to wander, to wonder, and to listen for the voices in the trees.

For readers drawn to atmospheric fiction where place and psyche intertwine, “The God of the Woods” is not to be missed. It is a tale that honors the wildness within us all—and reminds us that, in the end, the greatest mysteries are those we carry inside.

4H

by sssmahh303, posted in Lifestyle

Mary Ann

Throughout your life, you become members of different organizations and clubs.  It may be Girl or Boy Scouts, fraternities or sororities, church groups, Kiwanis, Rotary, VFW, book clubs, sport teams, and on and on.  All of them have influenced you in some way adding to the fabric of your life. It is our tribe or community.  It is a place where we belong. 

As I look back on my life, I belonged to many clubs, but the one organization that really influenced my life and helped me become who I am was the 4H.  I think most people think of 4H as a farmer’s club, and it does have famers.  However, it is far more than that. 

I was in 6th grade and joined the Dog Husbandry Club that was sponsored by the Purina Company and run by our local commissioner who had a rescue center for unwanted animals.  We were lucky to have such a caring man lead us.

 My brother, Timmy, and I loved our English and Irish Setters, so this club was made for us.  We learned about grooming, feeding, training, and showing our dogs.  We learned about responsibility with charts that depicted our hours devoted to training and grooming, and we would post the amount of feed we used to care for our dogs.  We would have a local dog show in the spring and a County 4H fair dog show later in the summer.  We demonstrated our mastery of skills at those shows.

As I grew older, I would do demonstrations about canine care – Primp Up Pooch or First-Aid for Pooch.  It gave me experience in public speaking, a skill I have used my whole life.  I would later become the club’s president, so I was learning leadership skills in that role.  My role expanded with the following years.  In my senior year of high school, I became a Keystone Winner representing the state of Pennsylvania at the National 4H Conference in Chicago, IL, 

We stayed at the Conrad Hilton – a big change for a small-town girl!   What an experience to be with hundreds of 4Hers representing their states.  Big cooperations like Ford or General Motors sponsored banquets for us, Miss America spoke, and we were guests of the city at their various attractions such as the Field Museum and a night club called The Cheetah.  It was truly a life-changing experience for me – there was a big world out there that I wanted to see. 

 4H gave me opportunities and experiences that have lasted a lifetime and shaped the person I have become.  I always loved the 4H Pledge. It is a meaningful way to live one’s life, and each leave of the clover represents a different H – head, heart, hands, and health.  It has always stayed with me, and I can readily recite it.   Let me share it with you.

4H Pledge

I pledge my head to clearer thinking,

My heart to greater loyalty,

My hands to larger service, 

And my health to better living, 

For my club, my community, my country, and my world.

What a positive way to live life!  However, the 4H Motto is what has been a true North Star in my life.  It is To Make the Best Better.  Whatever I have undertaken, I have tried to make it even better. The 4H gifted a pledge and a motto that has shaped my life, and I am so thankful for those words.  

Meal Train

by Cynthia, posted in Friends and Family

Yesterday, I dropped off food for the family of a friend who has just become a hospice patient.  I enjoy cooking.  I guess you could say it is my love language. So this was an opportunity to share my love and caring for my friend and her family.

How did this come about?  A few days ago I received an email from Meal Train. At first I thought it was a phishing email, but I noticed three of my friends received the same message. So I called one of them. She had the same question and was about to call a friend of the potential recipient. Unfortunately, it was not a scam. The request was legitimate. I mention this to say it might be a good idea first to let people know the friend or loved one is having medical issues. But I digress.

Meal Train is an online service on which one can easily set parameters in a request for help. Information such as food allergies and restrictions, acceptable drop-off times, and number of people for whom you are providing meals can be entered.  Suggested gift cards to restaurants and even cash donations can be requested.  The idea is to make it easy for the volunteers to know how to help.  The organizer sets up dates and times for delivery.

One nice feature is that everyone who has been invited to participate can see what everyone else is providing. I found that helpful to ensure I didn’t duplicate foods that someone else had already provided or planned to. The recipients get to experience a lot of different dishes.

We always say “please let me know how I can help.” But the person who is ill rarely will ask.  Sometimes they don’t want to put others out. Sometimes, they simply don’t know what they need. For the friends, we wonder how much is helpful and how much is an intrusion during difficult times. With the Meal Train, most of the questions are answered in a polite and efficient manner.

Meal Train sends tips and reminders once you sign up.  If participants read those messages, the information is valuable. One tip that wasn’t made clear but which I know I appreciated when I had help, was to take the food in containers that can be used to heat the food and then simply toss it. No one wants to spend hours in the kitchen away from the loved one. So many affordable disposable options are available, making it easy for both the recipient and the volunteer. In fact, I keep aluminum foil baking pans, “paper” bowls, and heavy disposable flatware on hand. Whenever someone leaves my house with leftovers, I don’t have to worry about getting my dishes back and they don’t have to worry about returning them. Win. Win.

Looking for more information I found other sites that provide similar services. Some of those are Give In Kind, SignUp Genius,  Care Calendar, Lotsa Helping Hands, and Take Them A Meal. Likely there are many others. Find a site, as these do, that allows you to set up a schedule at no charge.

Next time you need to organize meal deliveries to family and friends, consider using one of these sites. Once set up, coordinating and volunteering are easy, efficient, and very helpful.  Choo choo. I’m hopping on the Meal Train!