Category: Friends and Family

Mary Ann

When I was a young girl, my job at Christmas was to decorate the top of our piano.  We first put down some fake snow that was quilt batting.   Then, we would add Santa’s sleigh and various Christmas characters to the snowy scene.  The featured stars of the display were four elves that were Annalee Dolls.

Annalee Dolls started in 1934 by Annalee Thorndike in Meredith, NH.  It was a cottage industry growing out of the Depression. During the 1950s and 1960s, the felt dolls with the charming hand-painted faces began to take off around the country.  With each decade the company grew bigger and bigger adding little characters for all the holidays in a variety of sizes. They ran limited editions and collecting fever hit the nation. Each year new characters are introduced, and suddenly, you just must have the Mardi Gras elf!

My mother began collecting the Annalee Dolls in the early 1960s. She would get them from a lovely gift shop in our hometown called The Studio Shop.  She slowly grew her collection and decorated for each holiday with them. The catalogs would come, and she would place lots of orders 

 When I had my own family, I began to collect as well, but not nearly as many as my mother had.  I love the elves and have several of them for all the holidays.  However, I have a large collection of Christmas elves that are scattered all over the house.  They peek around every corner and will surprise guests at every turn.  I always seem to miss one or two when I put them away.  They surprise me!

When my mother passed, we had to find new homes for hundreds of Annalee Dolls.  I added several of hers to my collection. I gave relatives specific ones that I knew would have personal meaning to them.  In the end there were still about 200 plus dolls.  Then the hard part began – what do you do with them??  I tried to sell them to collectors who were also trying to find homes for their own collections. This went on for several months.  In the end we gave them to a Women’s Thrift shop that helped abused women.  They sold them at their auction and in the store.  I know this would have made my mother happy helping other women.  

Any of you that have collections from your own mothers such as Byers’ Carolers or Hummels or Jim Shore figures or Christmas Villages know what I mean about downsizing family collections.  No one in the family wants them anymore.  Once I am gone, I am not sure anyone in my family will want the precious Annalee Dolls.  I hope someone will want the original four elves from the top of the piano. 

 When I unwrap my dolls to display for a holiday, it makes me happy to visit with them again.  I know that my mother would be happy that they bring me joy.  Most importantly, “playing” with the Annalee Dolls is like I am visiting with my mother.  It brings a smile to my lips and a tear to my eye remembering her.  

As autumn leaves paint the landscape in warm hues of red, orange, and gold, families and friends across America come together to celebrate one of the most cherished holidays—Thanksgiving. It’s a day marked by gratitude, togetherness, and traditional food choices that bring people closer, reminding us of the importance of reflection and appreciation for the blessings in our lives.

Thanksgiving’s roots trace back to 1621, when Pilgrims and Native Americans shared a meal to commemorate a successful harvest. While the holiday’s history is complex and has evolved over the centuries, it remains a powerful reminder to pause and give thanks for what we have—our loved ones, health, home, and the opportunities that come our way.

What traditions do you enjoy on this day?

• Gathering Around the Table: The centerpiece of Thanksgiving is the meal itself, with turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, and pumpkin pie bringing warmth and comfort to the holiday.
• Expressing Gratitude: Many families share what they’re thankful for before digging into the feast—a tradition that fosters connection and appreciation.
• Watching the Parade: The Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade has become an American institution, delighting viewers with colorful floats and performances.
• Football and Fun: From backyard games to NFL showdowns, football is an enduring Thanksgiving staple.
• Giving Back: Volunteering and community service are ways people share their gratitude by helping those in need.

Whether you’re hosting a large gathering or enjoying a quiet day, Thanksgiving is an opportunity to connect with others and reflect on the year. Here are some ideas to make your celebration meaningful:

1. Cook Together: Involve everyone in meal prep, sharing cherished recipes and creating new memories.
2. Craft a Gratitude List: Encourage guests to jot down things they’re thankful for and read them aloud.
3. Reach Out: Call or video chat with distant friends and family to share the holiday spirit.
4. Donate: Consider supporting local food banks or charities in honor of the season.

This year, let’s celebrate not just with food and festivities, but with open hearts and a spirit of kindness. Whether you are near or far from loved ones, may your day be filled with joy, laughter, and gratitude. And may you remember to carry that spirit of gratitude with you each and every day. Wishing everyone a safe, happy, and memorable Thanksgiving!

I have lived on a corner lot for over 27 years. Admittedly, I do not know my neighbors. Until I retired I generally left the house by 7:00 am and arrived home some time after 8:00 pm – often later.

The front of my house is somewhat obscured from the street as it sports two large berms, separated by a sidewalk that comprises steps up and then down before emptying onto my front porch.  In the back I have a 750 sq ft deck below which is my back yard – if you can call it that. From the retaining wall under the deck to the stockade fence separating that neighbor’s home is only 20-30 ft. including a dry brook and an 89 ft long garden. On the north side of the house is what one would call the back yard as it is the largest area that is flat where children might play. On the garage side of the house which faces the side street is a yard peppered with trees that are much older than my home. All of this is to say – I don’t have ready access to visit with the people to whom I live the nearest.

Lately, however, I have been walking the neighborhood. I have my paths figured out which allow me to walk a little more than a mile in one pass. Occasionally I will wave at a drive passing by but seldom do I see other people.

Today I was later getting out. By the time I rounded the cul-de-sac and started the home loop, I observed a line of vehicles along the street where I had planned to walk.  Checking my watch I realized it was time for the little people to emerge from their school day.  A shaded sidewalk connects our neighborhood to the edge of an elementary school ground. Daily, parents walk or drive to meet their children.  It was as if a sleeping giant had come to life, with cars, SUVs, trucks, and even walkers converged on this one area of our neighborhood.

How nice it was to wave and to say hello to passersby – as I passed by.  I was struck by the number of fathers as well as mothers who took the time to greet their children on this lovely autumn afternoon.

Back at home and pulling a few weeds along the sidewalk in front of the berms, one new neighbor commented that he and his children were enjoying my yard decorations from skeletons in October to pumpkins and leaf structures this month.  Soon nutcrackers will adorn the yard for this year’s Tinsel Tribe theme.  But that is for another story.

Today, it is satisfying to see men and women and children as they go about their days. My heart is joyful and grateful for the ability to live in a safe and friendly neighborhood. I wish everyone could have similar experiences.

Mary Ann

At this spooky time of year with Halloween just around the corner, I was trying to find a family Halloween tale.  Of course, we have a Timmy story where I was the victim, and it scared me to death.

When I was young, I feared wolves.  I guess it was one too many fairytales. You know, Little Red Riding Hood kind of genre.  Timmy knew this and took every opportunity to scare me about them.  So, one Halloween Timmy took my mother’s wig and fur coat.  We had a rubber wolf mask that may be the root of my fears, so Timmy included the mask as part of his makeshift wolf costume.  He dressed up and hid under my bed. 

Night came.  I innocently went to my bedroom and crawled under the covers turning off the light as I snuggled in. The room was dark and out from under the bed came this creature, all brown, all hairy, and loudly growling!  There was a wolf in my bedroom, and it looked like it was going to eat me for its dinner.  I was shaking and screaming.  Nightmares were coming true!  And then the giggles began.  It wasn’t a wolf.  It was Timmy!   

Our parents came running and they too had to laugh at the costume – it was clever!  It is now funny, but that night I was terrified.  I was reassured that there were no wolves under my bed.  I can’t remember if Timmy got in trouble, but he was in trouble all the time anyway.  Timmy does not remember this incident at all.  I, however, have never forgotten that the big, bad wolf was under my bed.  For a long time, I hesitated as I walked into a dark room, and I always looked under my bed before going to sleep. I sort of still do….

Mary Ann

I have often shared stories of my childhood or a Timmy story with you. I have not shared anything that my own children’s childhoods.  I would like to tell such a story now.

When we lived in California, the library at the school that my children attended had a lending “library” of small animals like guinea pigs, hamsters, gerbils, or mice and rats that you could check out for the weekend.  It was a wonderful idea for children to enjoy a pet, learn a little about responsibility, and the family didn’t have to buy an animal with a cage, food, bedding, and the like. 

So, one Friday, my daughter brought home a mother rat with her 13 babies.  They were all white with brown spots.  It was only a two-day visit so what could possibility go wrong?  It was a lively group and our whole family got a chance to play with the little ones.  Mother Rat was attentive, and she was quite patient with her babies being manhandled by children.  

Rats are very intelligent and can be quite loving.  It is the word Rat that is a turn off. If you watch All Creatures Great and Small on PBS, Siegfried Farnon, the older vet, has a pet rat.  Rats are interesting, and Siegfried thoroughly enjoys his little friend.  He kept it next to his desk.

I digress.  Saturday came without incident.  Then I walked into my daughter’s bedroom to find an empty rat cage. OMG!  There are 14 rats loose in my house.  Where were they?  Well, next to the dresser where the cage was kept was my daughter’s big wooden doll house. Something told me to look inside, and I did.  It may have been seeing a tail coming out of one of the windows.  There were all the babies with their mother supervising.  The babies were in the bathtub, on the little beds, running up and down the stairs, sitting on the couch and chairs.  At first, it was shocking but after watching them enjoying themselves, it was rather charming. The doll house furniture was just their size.  The baby rats were ready to move it!

I then became a rat wrangler!  I picked up each of the babies by their tails and put them back into their container.  Mother Rat joined them and was happy to be home   She did not want to leave her babies.   When they were all back together in their home, they piled on top of one another like a football scrum for a nap.  Mother Rat took a nap as well always keeping watch on her mischievous brood. I am sure she was exhausted. They had had quite an adventure.  

The rats returned to school Monday morning. I must admit I was not sad to see them go.  However, the library set up adoptions for the babies, and guess what, we adopted one.  Pooky was a very good pet and was loved by the whole family.  I can assure you that Pooky’s cage had a very secure lid.  The only downside of a pet rat is that they chew.  You had to be careful not to put clothing anywhere near her cage.  Otherwise, a sleeve of a sweater soon became a rat’s nest of colorful yarn.  We learned this the hard way.  

I was thankful for my children to have the experience of caring and loving one of God’s creatures.  Over the years we had many little furry friends.  Parents everywhere need to thank all the little mice, hamsters, gerbils, guinea pigs, and yes, rats for being loving pets to their children!   They are always there for a snuggle.  It teaches children responsibility, how life cycles work, and caring for a fellow creature. In the end a mouse (rat) in the house can be a really good thing!

Mary Ann

Timmy stories are part of our family culture.  There is always a lesson in them, and our family grew from the experiences.  However, I am beginning to think that our mother left us alone way too much. She was a strict yet loving mother, and we knew the guidelines.  When she was away, that is when the action happened.  Let me share a Timmy story of one such occasion.

My brother Timmy loved to cook.  However, you could only cook when our mother was home.  That was the family rule, but one Saturday in the summer, Timmy decided to break the rule and make some fudge.  Full disclosure, I was not an accomplice in this venture.  I was reading somewhere in the house while the caper unfolded.

I heard the banging of pans and smelled the chocolate brewing into fudge, and then there was a burnt sugar smell.  After that, there were no sounds in the house, so I went on reading.  Upstairs in the kitchen, Timmy was panicked as the fudge morphed into a burnt blob of sugar, and it would not come off the pan. He thought the fudge was stuck forever!

This was mother’s favorite pan to use when she was cooking, and it would be missed at the next meal prep. Timmy used typical kid logic and needed to hide the evidence.  We had a big field across the road in the front of our house.  He took the pan outside in the front yard and heaved it into the field across the street.  The pan landed in high grass.  No one would know what happened.  He knew he would be in double trouble for unauthorized cooking and destroying our mother’s favorite pan.  He was not free from worry as a cloud of doom formed over his head.

For the next few weeks our mother ranted about the missing pan blaming our father for using it to feed the dogs.  Our father knew better.  I could honestly say I had no idea where it was.  Timmy would deny any knowledge of the pan.  However, he began having trouble sleeping.  He was sick at his stomach.  He couldn’t eat.  It got so bad that he finally confessed one night after he said his prayers.

So, our mother got a flashlight, and Timmy and she went into the field in search of the pan.  It was right where he said he threw it, but there was a surprise!  The pan was clean as a whistle.  I think Timmy learned the power of prayer.  Apparently, the ants had a picnic and feasted on the burnt fudge.  

There is a quote by Lafcadia Hearn about ants – All good work is done the way ants do things: Little by Little.  And boy, did the ants do exactly that.  I don’t remember Timmy getting into trouble.  He had punished himself far more than my parents would have punished him.  I do know our mother was happy to have her pan back.  Timmy’s shoulders were much lighter, and we all learned that burnt pans can be cleaned by ants if all else fails. Tuck that cleaning hack away for another day!   

What image do you conjur when you hear the term “Book Club?” If you have never been in a book club, you may be thinking “boring intellectuals” or “seedy romance fantasies.” When I affectionately mention my book club I see eyes roll or blank stares. I just smile. I love my book club!

We are the Literary Lattes. Literary means concerned with or connected with the writing, study, or appreciation of literature (Collins Dictionary); literature being books and writings published on a particular subject (Oxford Languages Dictionary). Lattes are … well … yummy coffee or tea drinks.  We meet once a month at a Barnes and Noble Café, hence the lattes. Usually we add a scone or breakfast sandwich since we meet mid-morning.

In my professional, working years, I had time only to read those things that furthered my knowledge of the position I held and the industry I was in. Once retired, I was starving for some intellectual stimulation, camaraderie, and the expansion of my realm of understanding. A book club seemed to be a good option.

Honestly, I tried starting my own, but after a couple of years, it fizzled out. The people I invited were not committed to process – read the book, discuss, drink some wine, eat some appetizers. Then I tried another but there was too much drama. The organizer was an extremely rule-bound, control freak – nice lady but so obsessed with the rules she created that members of the club began to drop out. That book club was a bit too intense for my retirement entertainment.

Now I have found the perfect match for myself. The group is small, allowing each person to have the space to share her interpretation of the month’s selection. We use one of the many free services available for scheduling and sharing ideas – Book Clubs. I opted to pay for the Premium version so we can have multiple administrators. Our book club is fluid and flexible, so anyone can send messages to others, create book lists, schedule meetings, and post reviews. In this way, no one person is “in charge.”  It works for us.

We select books four-to-six months in advance. If someone has extra time or wants to take along a book when traveling, we always know we can read a book in the queue. The books we pick come from various genres: historical fiction, memoir, occasional “beach reads”, mysteries, Pulitzer prize winners, best sellers, and so on. I like the mix. When I am not reading a book club choice, I can always read another book of my own liking.

Recommendations often come from friends outside our club who have read a particular book and shared his or her thoughts. Often, we run across a review or see the book mentioned so many times we figure “maybe we should read this one.” Almost always, we will read a book I otherwise would not have selected for whatever reason. This expands my horizons.

We read the format we prefer for the title and the time –hard cover, soft cover, electronic, or audio. Members have commented that the audio version provided a voice for the characters or author. Of the Kindle version eliminated the extras that appeared at the end of the hard copy.

I enjoy hearing the varying perspectives. Others find passages I may have skimmed over or validate ones that really “spoke” to me. We don’t always agree on the intent of a character or the author’s underlying purpose, be we respectfully listen to each opinion and openly and honestly share our own. How refreshing it is to be able to engage in civil discourse over the content of a published work.

Books can transcend time and place. They can take us where we have never been or where we wish we could go. And according to research, the act of reading stimulates one’s mental capacity and possibly cognitive longevity.

If you are a member of a book club, you probably are nodding your head.  If you are not but would like to be, check with your local library, look online, or even a local bookstore – many of which sponsor book clubs. You may have to try a few to find the right fit. Once you do, I believe you will find new friendships in the people who attend or in the characters in the book. Happy reading!

Today is my aunt Madaline’s 96^th birthday. Had my mom lived, it would also have been hers. Obviously, they were twins. Even into their 90s they still looked so much alike that people who didn’t know them well would mistake one for the other. We always got a laugh out of that.

Aunt Madaline is the introvert; mom was the extrovert. Both had a positive outlook on life and laughed often, as did their father, who had a booming laugh with eyes that sparkled when he smiled. Both were generous with their time and talents. Born in Kansas, they always reminded me of sunflowers, always “turning toward the light.”

It wasn’t until I moved my mother in with me and started helping her prepare birthday cards and gifts for her siblings that I came to the realization of the siblings’ birth dates. I was fascinated when I found that July and August 14 were the female siblings’ birth dates. March and April 24 were the male siblings birth dates. These days ending in fours make it easy for me to carry on the tradition of acknowledging my aunts’ and uncles’ birthdays – at least the ones on my mother’s side of the family.  Of the five of them, three are still living and in relatively good health.

The youngest was my Uncle Campbell. When he turned 89, he told my mom, who was a hospice patient, that she had to hold on until he turned 90 so all of them could be in the 90s together. He made it to 90 in March, just a couple of months before mom passed away late in May. We all got such a kick out of him. As with my grandfather, Uncle Campbell loved life, laughed often, and made friends everywhere he went.  We lost him in December last year, the same year my mom passed. I found that somewhat ironic.

Last month I took brunch to the youngest sister and middle sibling to celebrate her birthday. She had married a farmer, so her life was much different from the twins’ lives. My mother and aunt Madaline worked outside of the home – mom, part time. Madaline and her husband, a WWII veteran who is 99, owned a flower shop and a department store in a small town in Kansas, before moving to the city where my parents lived. The “boys” were a Navy captain and a business executive, respectively.  These siblings were close even though they lived in different states and sometimes in different countries.

On my daddy’s side, only one sibling is still living. She is a beautiful 83-year-old who looks like a 65-year-old. She loves to entertain, getting special dish ideas off Pinterest to fit the occasion. We celebrated her July 2 birthday this year with a tropical-themed brunch. (I make a point *not* to use the patriotic theme for her birthday each year.) It was a privilege to host her, her husband, and my cousins for a small gathering in Aunt Kathy’s honor. She is an amazing woman!

Of course, I like to celebrate my own siblings, too. Sadly, our brother is no longer with us physically but remains in our hearts. My sister and my sister-in-love make a point to touch base frequently – sometimes multiple times a day! While birthday gifts are no longer as important as they once were, acknowledgement in even more so. The older we get, the more we appreciate the gift of family … and of friends.

Saying happy birthday is just another way to say, “You are important to me. I love you.”

Yesterday, I dropped off food for the family of a friend who has just become a hospice patient.  I enjoy cooking.  I guess you could say it is my love language. So this was an opportunity to share my love and caring for my friend and her family.

How did this come about?  A few days ago I received an email from Meal Train. At first I thought it was a phishing email, but I noticed three of my friends received the same message. So I called one of them. She had the same question and was about to call a friend of the potential recipient. Unfortunately, it was not a scam. The request was legitimate. I mention this to say it might be a good idea first to let people know the friend or loved one is having medical issues. But I digress.

Meal Train is an online service on which one can easily set parameters in a request for help. Information such as food allergies and restrictions, acceptable drop-off times, and number of people for whom you are providing meals can be entered.  Suggested gift cards to restaurants and even cash donations can be requested.  The idea is to make it easy for the volunteers to know how to help.  The organizer sets up dates and times for delivery.

One nice feature is that everyone who has been invited to participate can see what everyone else is providing. I found that helpful to ensure I didn’t duplicate foods that someone else had already provided or planned to. The recipients get to experience a lot of different dishes.

We always say “please let me know how I can help.” But the person who is ill rarely will ask.  Sometimes they don’t want to put others out. Sometimes, they simply don’t know what they need. For the friends, we wonder how much is helpful and how much is an intrusion during difficult times. With the Meal Train, most of the questions are answered in a polite and efficient manner.

Meal Train sends tips and reminders once you sign up.  If participants read those messages, the information is valuable. One tip that wasn’t made clear but which I know I appreciated when I had help, was to take the food in containers that can be used to heat the food and then simply toss it. No one wants to spend hours in the kitchen away from the loved one. So many affordable disposable options are available, making it easy for both the recipient and the volunteer. In fact, I keep aluminum foil baking pans, “paper” bowls, and heavy disposable flatware on hand. Whenever someone leaves my house with leftovers, I don’t have to worry about getting my dishes back and they don’t have to worry about returning them. Win. Win.

Looking for more information I found other sites that provide similar services. Some of those are Give In Kind, SignUp Genius,  Care Calendar, Lotsa Helping Hands, and Take Them A Meal. Likely there are many others. Find a site, as these do, that allows you to set up a schedule at no charge.

Next time you need to organize meal deliveries to family and friends, consider using one of these sites. Once set up, coordinating and volunteering are easy, efficient, and very helpful.  Choo choo. I’m hopping on the Meal Train!

Mary Ann

When I was born mid-century, now an antique, double names were in vogue – Debbie Sue or Barbara Ann.  I was named after my grandmother, Mary, and there was a great, great grandmother who was named Mary Ann. I did not have a middle name.  However, the entire world for my entire life has tried to make me a Mary and Ann as my middle name.  I have never felt like a Mary.  I am Mary Ann.

For the most part I could correct my name by raising my hand or changing my name on the back of a document sent to me – you know, put corrections on the back. I tried using my maiden name as a middle name and the Ann was still dropped.  

I lived like this for most of my life until Social Security suddenly began to call me Mary.  For years, they used Mary Ann.  I guess with a new computer system or whatever, they dropped the Ann.   It is interesting to be in a Social Security office and have they tell you your name is Mary and you tell them no, it is not.  Sorry, that is how your state has registered your birth so we must use that. Oh, NO!!

Social Security then sent me to the courts to change my name.  The judge looked at my birth certificate and said you can’t change your name to your name.  Then he sent me on my way.  This was a bit frustrating.  I went to see my Congressional Representative.  Of course, I didn’t see him, but I got a staffer who was most helpful.   They told me to bring my parents to the local office, and they could verify what my name was.  My ninety-year-old parents went with me to the office.  They told the staff that I was a Mary Ann with no middle name.  The paperwork was completed, and my name was submitted as MaryAnn, no space.  A month or so later, I received a new birth certificate.  I then submitted it to Social Security, and they finally accepted it using my correct name. 

Thankfully, my parents were alive to help me correct my name.  I am not sure what I would have had to do if they were not.  I guess I would have had to hire a lawyer and go back to court.  For the most part, things have been better now since I have done the change.  When I get mail now, those who address me as Mary do not know me, and I pay no attention to the correspondence.  

Naming your child is one of the biggest responsibilities a parent has.  There are so many things to consider.  Does the name have more than one spelling?  Is it easy to pronounce?    Do the initials spell something weird?  Are you going to give an extremely long name to your child?  Think of a first grader learning to spell his or her name. It will take them forever to do this.  Sometimes a baby name doesn’t age well, and conversely, an adult name can be a heavy thing for little shoulders to carry.  Be mindful if you give a double name to your child.  Make it one word if you can such as Annamarie or Marianne. You can also add a hyphen – this is called a double barrel name and is common in many countries such as the UK.  Just know if you don’t, you are giving your child a lifetime of hoops to jump through.  I am living proof!

Some countries in the world actually have restrictions on naming children.  However, the United States is known as the naming wild west – anything goes. Elon Musk has used digits to name one of his children – XAEA-12.   According to the Social Security records, Olivia and Liam are the top USA names for this past year – easy in every way! 

I have just purchased my headstone, and I made sure that my name was correctly spelled as I want it.  I don’t want to go into eternity with the wrong name planted above me!  It has been a bit of hell on earth for me fighting constantly to correct my name.  I would like to rest in peace!!