Accept and Adapt

Mary Ann

Ever since Covid, my friend Lisa and I have done a non-fiction book club. I have mentioned this in the past.  It has been a wonderful experience reading challenging books and then discussing them.  Some books have been exceptional, and others were duds.  However, we found certain themes immerging, and then came up with our own theory about how to cope with aging.  

As one ages, there is a decline.  Every day you wake up to a new ache or pain that wasn’t there yesterday.  You know you are older, yet it is still a surprise.   Sometimes you just want to hide under the covers and stay in bed all day.  However, you get up, take a deep breath and face the world.  You must decide how you are going to handle the new challenge.

We all know that you need to get a good night’s sleep, eat nutritional meals, exercise, be social, and keep your mind active.  This is something that we can control.  See you doctor for checkups and get your various tests and shots.  Again, you have control here, but much of your health is not in your control.  

Lisa and I gleaned from our readings that accepting and adapting may be a two-step plan to handle many of our aging challenges.  This is not really anything new, but we are using it to help us make sense about growing older.  With acceptance, you may have to give yourself time to mourn the way things used to be.  It is not easy giving up the ability to do something.  It is a loss.  Take your time to heal.  Then you must figure out how to adapt to your new reality.  For example, you may have developed a mobility issue and can’t travel or at least like you used to travel. It is hard to give up something you love to do. This is the time you speak up for yourself and research a condition or aliment and partner with your doctor. It may be getting a prescription for physical therapy to gain strength.  However, you must put in the work to improve.  Then you may have to adapt by using a wheelchair at the airport or use a cane or walker to get around places. Sometimes you must swallow your pride to make things happen.  Tons of people are traveling with all kinds of conditions and do so with a little help. 

Gratitude for what we can still do has also helped us cope with the changes.  Sometimes we must remind one another about this when we are whining about an ailment.  We are hanging in there, and that is not bad as aging people.  That is our silver shimmering!  You need to appreciate your body and care for it during all the different stages of your life.  The change is going to happen anyway. 

This is not a perfect cure for getting older, but it has helped us manage aging.  Often, we will discuss alternatives if suddenly one of us wakes up with stiff knees. What are the steps in gaining some control again?  These two techniques have made a difference in our lives.  We hope that they may make a difference in yours.  Accept and Adapt!  Then say a little prayer of thanks!